


At the Wars End

by ChaoticPines



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Character Death, Demon Deals, Gen, Guilt, Hatred, Regret, Self-Hatred, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-14 02:35:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17499944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChaoticPines/pseuds/ChaoticPines
Summary: The war is over but was the price of things easily avoided worth it





	At the Wars End

It’s funny how sometimes you fuck up so bad nothing else matters. One day you’re a normal teen and the next both of your best friends are dead and a demon has taken over your dimension. Also, it’s all your fault. 

Don’t open the portal, make deals with something you don’t understand, leave Stan and Ford to fix the mess you made. They can’t even look at you now, and how could you expect them to after what you did? Your other friends look at you with hate and disgust. “Don’t ever come back” they’d spat at you. You want to go back. You want to change what you did. These stupid mistakes lead to their deaths. They must hate you too. 

It’s just after midnight and you’re in the bathroom floor of your apartment with an unopened bottle of pills in your hand, counting the minutes. How long have you been sitting here working up the courage to do this? You don’t have the right to be trying to back out of this. After what you’d done, this is getting off easy. You can’t even do this for a selfless reason, as much as you’re denying it and shoving it down you know you’re doing this because of the guilt. The guilt you should be forced to live with. Slowly you open the bottle and bring two pills to your lips. 

It’s all your fault. You made a deal without fully understand the consequences or what exactly you were agreeing to do. You wish you could blame him but you can’t, you willingly agreed to his conditions. He’d taken your body and used your body, your hands, to rip them apart while everyone watched. If only you had listened to them. 

You’re downing pills by the handful now. You wonder how they’ll react when they hear the news. You didn’t leave a note. Didn’t need one. Just another murderer overcome by guilt. They’d told you not to take it. To not trust or accept what he’d said to you. Warned you he was dangerous. You tried to stop the portal from opening, tried to kill Ford. You’re a monster. Despite all they said you decided to be selfish, to do what you wanted for your own gain. It wasn’t worth it. He’d gave you what you asked but the price was so large. You’d watched him rip them to pieces and you couldn’t even scream. You knew you had caused their deaths. When you got your body back, they all knew it was you and not him. 

Your vision is starting to blur and your mind is getting fuzzy. Blackness is creeping into the edges of your vision. You hope this will make them happy. It won’t reverse or make up for what you did but maybe it will bring them some sort of relief, knowing you’re in hell. There’s no way of you knowing that of course. 

If you could just fix this, but you don’t know if there’s any way to bring them back. After they died Ford and Stan had to make a plan on the spot and managed to defeat Bill, saving the world. You were pulled back into your body, crawling to the twin's corpses to be kicked away by Wendy. The war was over but you had caused them pain and grief to last forever. You wondered if the twins would ever learn to forgive you, wherever they are. You hope that they hate you just as much as the others do. If you could make just one more deal you would fix everything. You would give your broken soul up if it meant they could be brought back and the suffering you caused could be erased but you know it’s too late. Bill was dead and you lost your chance to fix it. 

You sigh as your eyes begin to close, the medicine finally giving you the relief you desired. Just as you’re about to lose consciousness you think you see a glimpse of yellow and an unnerving laugh..

**Author's Note:**

> I was bored and this didn't fit with my ongoing story so I decided to make it it's own thing, sorry if it's trashy though.


End file.
